Galentine’s Day!

From a young age, many of us are conditioned to compete with one another. While healthy forms of competition between friends, siblings, and teammates are a vital role in our development as humans, society often reinforces toxic competition between women. For this reason, and too many others to mention, Galentine’s Day, a fictional holiday dreamt up by Amy Poehler’s character, Leslie Knope, in Parks & Recreation, is definitely an event worth celebrating.

Since I do not have a PHD in Sociology, Women’s Studies, or anything actually, I don’t know all the facts surrounding the origins of the “competitive female phenomena”. From what I’ve observed, however, it seems that unhealthy competition among women often stems from an underlying “survival of the fittest” mentality. This mentality is magnified by the fact that women of all ages have to fight harder and more strategically for a seat at the table in comparison to their male counterparts.

According to americanprogress.org, women make up only 5 percent of Fortune 500 CEOs—down from a record high of 6 percent in 2017. While I’m sure there are several complex factors that go into the reasons behind these statistics, the fact remains that for most Americans, this isn’t a big surprise.

Throughout history, men have traditionally taken on leadership roles in the workplace, while women (once it was legal and socially acceptable for them to have a job) have been hired to support them. Society has made little headway in cultivating a more balanced workplace, and that trickles down more than many of us realize. Most little girls aren’t empowered to be “the boss”, and several lack real life role-models who open their eyes to the possibility. Girls who are lucky enough to be taught otherwise, come into direct competition with their female peers who crave a similar sense of well-deserved power. In turn, tension and hostility arise among future leaders, who should be joining forces rather than using all their strength to compete with one another.

What can we do to combat this issue?

Teach children, especially girls, that blowing out another person’s flame doesn’t make theirs any brighter. In fact, remind them that their flame will probably shrink due to all the work their tiny lungs are putting into all that huffin’ and puffin’. Treat teenagers like the young adults they are and communicate with them about all issues, including gender equality. Embrace and enforce empathy in all areas of your life and be open to both listening to and understanding the concerns that other’s express about any unfair treatment they’ve endured.

Most importantly, celebrate the women in your life to balance out the very real judgement they’ve undoubtedly experienced based solely on their gender. My best friend in the world is With Her Own Hands director, Kathryn McCarthy. Our strengths are similar, and we both want to succeed in our careers more than anything, but building a foundation of respect and understanding, rather than competition and “one-upmanship”, is what has allowed us to take on something as epic as making a feature film. I have been so lucky to have her, and several other women in my life, who have built me up. These friendships and mentorships have taught me how vital it is to keep that same energy when interacting with other bold and creative gal pals.

Happy Galentine’s Day to all you lovers out there!

P.S. Remember, men are not the enemy, ignorance and inequality is.(Also cockroaches, but that is not what we’re talking about today).